Most days you’ll be shown the spring buds, the big blooms, the thriving space. After 33 years of never being exposed, it feels like poison ivy is now up my nose. All it took was one exposure for a future of paranoia - it’s manifesting everywhere.

All the while, the risks are evident and the work still needs to get worked. I trust that clients will be honest, transparent, and conscientious of how their space will affect me. That said, we simply don’t know what we don’t know. Until we do.

Maybe it’s a reminder to slow down. That this work is intentional. That we do it for health + beauty rather than for speed. That no plant is bad, but every plant has its place.

A client recently noted to me how weeds appear near plants that look exactly alike. “Pay attention!” she said. “You’ll notice it everywhere!” It’s true. The similarities to nearby plants - sometimes weeds love to play tricks on you. Though the term “weed” is subjective. A dearest love for me may be a dreaded bystander for you. “Low-value succulents,” as one once called them, removed from her and received graciously by you.

No garden is “no maintenance,” I always say. Exactly how much, depends on you…

Poison ivy, with its contrasting pink stems and bright green leaves, reminds me of Sour Watermelon Candy. A deer in headlights as its vibrance catches your eye, diminished by the realization of the other side.

Bush-like or vining - it moves far and wide. Often alongside other ivies, creepers, alone or intertwined. Dead or alive, burned or composted, still - her influence thrives.

And then there are those who simply can’t feel her grasp. Untouchable.

What must we do to survive?

I can’t say I really expected any different - but I have to bring some light to the experience of building your own small business in our economy today.

A constant and emotionally dwindling response to the question of “exactly how much are YOU going to be WORTH TO ME, today?”

No matter how honest, intentional, how much integrity we offer, how much formal education, experience, or genuine passion we have behind us..there will always be a deep rooted lack of trust, scrutiny and a self-righteous glare staring back at us. We are just the worker bees, the peasants, the ones fallen to our knees. Does my big + beautiful vegetable garden not say to the world what your Ferrari does? I am so sorry that your private charter plane has left you no money for your Essential Garden Fairie, though you expect her, and healthy plants, all the same. We are re-building the mutually beneficial narrative. You support me, and I support you - come on folks, this is not new. First come government taxes, then come excessive business fee losses, then come fines for lack of accessible information, then come Mary and Jospeh in a baby carriage. Your plant + garden spaces bring you genuine joy in regards to your home, your family, time with the sea, the forest, in business + play, you clearly care enough to inquire here today. What exactly is the monetary amount, physical effort, care, genuine interest, flexibility, time and collaborative effort that would make it worth the commitment, for you?? Please, endulge me - elaborate - on what exactly it is I can do, just for you, today??? 

A lot of people would probably argue that I am a pessimist, and in a lot of ways I see how that can be true.  A lot of people just don’t understand the “grand scheme” That much is true, too.

This morning at a favorite and frequented bakery, the man behind the counter made a comment that I always have a big smile on my face. He made a gentle gesture and thanked me for bringing such energy. “Well when I am here for Chocolate Chip Scone Friday… a smile there will be!” After a few weird weeks, job transitioning, leaps of faith - it felt damn good to hear. I feel so full with the way my life is evolving. I knew all those weird heavy life decisions wouldn’t lead me astray. I am so glad to have been lead this way... The thing of it is - the teachers that have helped shape this way. We work to have the awareness to hear the calls, but then we have to actually do the work to follow them. They might get all the credit, but the sentiment is well rounded, and stems from within.

Later that same day, a women came up to me while getting mulch at the local garden store. She was engaged, curious - loving my logo and my cutie truck bed planter box. Asking me all of the questions. Who are you? What and where do you do? How do you do it? By yourself? How much do you charge? “YOU ARE ON THE RIGHT TRACK,” she says. “Keep doing what you do, we need more people like you.” A farmer/gardener herself, at the age of 65 and with lots of land to steward on the coast of Maine - she gets it. She sees the people doing the good work, she knows how depleting it is and she takes the initiative to take the time out of her day to come over and say “you get it to - who are you?” It’s about community. Resilience. Carrying all of these heavy but important lessons forward. How can all of us help educate you?

A reminder that within the moments of sadness, self-doubt, worry - there are people who notice the other side, who see you for you, who make a point to tell you you are doing a good and rightly thing. Amongst the people that don’t, there are plenty of people that want to know and support you. 

I had an experience recently where I asked the teacher to give me a glimpse of where this is all headed. She spoke softly and safely when she said “Come with me, i’ll show you your future - it’s so good.” As if that wasn’t exactly what I was hoping to hear, it was all just too much too soon. “OK. Nevermind. Don’t show me.” And off I fled. This brief moment in time felt like a lifetime before I realized what my big problem is, the point where it always goes wrong. I call in that which I want and need and then even when it’s sitting in my lap, I refuse to believe its really there. A good thing? Happening to me? Yes actually… all you have to do is trust it, and you will see.

A part of our practice as sustainable growers is to differentiate when we need to buck up and get the job done despite the weather vs. when we should make the effort to re-arrange so that each thing is still done with integrity and in an ergonomic manner. There is something to be said about working with the elements and accepting the challenge to do things a little differently than preferred, today. Because at the end of the day.. we’re preaching to “work with the seasons, not against them.” The heavy dew, the windy rain - it’s all just a mind game. The people are quieter, the birds are louder, the trees come alive in grand manor as if to say “Mother Nature doesn’t stand a chance, to me.” But, inevitably.. we are not all invincible in the ways we might believe ourselves to be. We either crack and crumble, or we bend and twist.. we work to have the awareness to make the choice for ourselves, in any given moment.

For better or for worse we know the tides will soon change, so for now and as always we buck up and do our best to keep with the flow.